Tuesday, January 12, 2010

blah blah blah baby stuff

it's been forever since i blogged. i need to be more consistent about things...maybe someday.
i'm moving up to DC in three days. the movers come to pack everything on friday, and i fly on saturday. until the start of this week it didn't really seem real, even though i was getting ready for it. but suddenly it is real and i'm really leaving and i really feel sad. i'm going to miss my friends. i'm going to miss my cozy apartment. of course, i'm excited about the move. i'm so glad to finally get to live with tony, and our new place is beautiful. but i'm also sad. i don't like changes, even when they are good and necessary ones and even when i've chosen to make them.

in news about my foetus that is way more interesting to me than to anyone else, baby is now 4 inches long and weighs 1.5oz. it has eyebrows, finger and toenails, and can suck its thumb. it has distinguishable sex organs now, though we still won't be able to find out for a few weeks whether it is a he or a she. it's starting to grow hair on its head. i'm still hardly showing at all. i really hope i start to show soon.
i've decided to have a home birth. i've been contacting midwives in DC, and was excited to find out that my insurance covers home birth! no cold, hard, infection filled hospital for me! no condescending doctors and fussy nurses! no unnecessary and counterproductive interventions and monitoring! i'm so relieved. at a hospital i would have had to spend my energy fighting for respectful treatment and a natural birth. with a midwife, those come standard. and, she will come to my home for prenatal visits! i'm so excited. tony is leery of it, but i think he will come around. the statistics are pretty black and white in favor of home birth as the safest option as far as preventing infection, fetal distress, c-section, excess birth pain, and postpartem depression. i had been really worried about birth, but now that home birth is an option i feel very much at peace and confident.

i'm becoming one of those people who only talks about boring pregnancy things. i realize this is happening, but i can do little to nothing to stop it. i used to have all kinds of interesting thoughts about the world and life...they have all been eclipsed by hormones. this is just the way it is. i hope that i will become interesting again after the baby is born, but i doubt it. i think this sort of thing only gets worse.